It has long been a mindset that discipline can only be taught through punishment.
With the passage of time, luckily, things have improved, and there is more focus on a positive attitude in teaching and maintaining discipline.
It is suggested that in case children make some mistake, you should guide them to improve their behavior instead of punishing them.
Thus it is essential to have knowledge of how to discipline a children’s behavior. This will help you to become a good mom and also know what you need to do with the baby and what is not good for your baby.
How to Discipline a Children’s Behavior?
During the children’s learning process, parents should avoid their impulsive desire to punish their kids.
A few important steps can help in going back from punishment to teaching mindset.
Positive Mindset (Criticize the Behavior, Not the Kids)
The very proposition is that; it is the behavior that is wrong and not the kids.
If parents change their thinking pattern and try to understand that their children are not unfavorable; it is only that they have started behaving in an odd manner. Things will start getting improved once this point is properly understood by the parents.
A common attitude on the part of the parents is that whenever they find their kid doing something wrong, they feel embarrassed as if their kids have completely lost their discipline.
Usually, they are titled to be a ‘naughty girl’ or a ‘bad boy’; that shows that you have deduced your kids to be a particular ‘type.’ This way, you have inculcated your negative opinion in your child’s mind.
There could be one of the various reasons behind such negative behavior of your child; he could be tired, hungry, or sleepy. It is possible that something in the environment has influenced your kid to behave improperly.
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Do Not Point Out the Mistakes, Guide Your Children How to Rectify the Things
If a positive outlook is maintained; you can handle situations in a different manner.
When you find that your kid is about to hit some other child, you should not shout at him not to do it. Instead, you should tell him what to do if he is annoyed. You can guide that it would hurt his own hand as well, and this act is nor the appropriate one.
If you do not guide him about hitting being a wrong act, he cannot guess on his own; as children usually follow their impulses. Parents and elders need to tell the kids the difference between the wrong and right attitude.
Be Gentle But Firm; Show Compassion and Regard
Children believe their behavior to be just and right. And they can keep insisting on it for long.
Parents should not argue; they should stay composed and keep repeating in a gentle manner that the behavior of the child was inappropriate.
Some good attitudes need to be insisted and repeated; ‘It is not good to hit our siblings, it hurts’ and ‘It is good to share your toys with your friends even when they do not give us their toys’ and other options to emphasize the right type of behavior.
You show empathy to your child by accepting that his demand is justified in getting a bear or any toy from his brother, still, hitting is not a good choice. When your child finds you compassionate empathetic, they respect your words.
Offering Choices is Good
After showing compassion and empathy, it is good that you offer some choices to your kid. Kids find themselves to be in command of their choices.
It is strongly recommended by specialists that children should get a message they are not a ‘bad type.’ Instead of punishing him, it is wise that you offer him a choice to gratify his self-respect.
You can tell him that he should hug his brother and say sorry, shake hands with him, or offer him the toy that he had snatched.
It is not that you offer a single choice to your child in such a situation you can offer him two or more options to choose from.
You should respect his choice because all the options were provided by you.
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Believe that Mistakes are a Part of Learning Process
Your conviction that children commit mistakes in the process of growth of learning makes you perform your role in a more dignified and confident manner.
When a child does something wrong, you can tell him that his behavior was not a good one. Instead of delivering a lecture, you can share, instances from your childhood that how you used to behave in such situations.
Now you can guide him by giving a variety of possible responses in some critical situation.
This way, you educate him on how to behave even in your absence.
How to Discipline a Strong-Willed Child?
With your positive behavior, you cannot expect your kids to admit their mistake easily; they can even exhibit hostile behavior as well.
But you have inculcated a thinking pattern in your child’s mind that he is not a bad boy; it is only that he did not behave well. This positive attitude on your part can pave the way to set it the things right gradually. This way, you can raise your baby boy right.
If you find that your child has hit his fellow, you should tell him that this act was not an appropriate one. He should say sorry to his friend. Your kid may not be ready to apologize at once and needs time to make his mind.
You can wait for him to apologize; until then you can read a storybook with him. This ‘given time’ helps your child to make up his mind to rectify his behavior.
According to a famous behaviorist, F.B Skinner, a good attitude can be taught through positive reinforcement.
The first and foremost thing is to start, and then gradually, things are expected to be on the right track properly.
Parents should understand that it is not their children who are wrong, but their behaviors are.
They can guide their children to improve their behavior and understand that punishment cannot serve the purpose.
Parents must not lose their temper or raise their voice in guiding their children.
By and large, if you know how to discipline a child, then you can guide your child in a better way.